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but I feel so low inside. I feel that the house will never sale and I will be living in limbo for the rest on my life. I have a smile on my lips and tears burn at the back of my eyes.
It hurts that me children have sided with him and I don’t see my grandchildren. I don’t want them to side with me but just to see I’m not the monster he has portray me as.
Im not suicidal but I wish I didn’t have to wake up the next day. But then to wake up I would have to sleep and I have stop doing that.
Sorry to post this but I have to let it out somewhere.
xx
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Bless you, Falling Skys.
You are in limbo. I pray things will move soon.
You didn’t deserve any of this.
What I want to say is, that I have always loved my children more than life itself, but their fluctuating ms ovulation. Y my ex has made me realise: we gave them the greatest gift of life, and loved like any mother can love, but we need to realise that we aren’t 100% our kids.
We should never even had been made to feel that we were 100% our husbands.
I don’t know what way the wind will blow regarding my kids and their dad, but all I know is that I can’t lose myself again. So you too must not lose yourself.
Your ex made you feel like you had. Now he wants it to happen to you again by proxy- through the kids.
Don’t allow it. I know it hurts. But ironically, nature is such that as soon as you find your identity again, your kids will flock back. But you won’t even be that dependent anymore. You will love them, but you won’t be so dependent.
I hope your house sells soon and I wish you all the strength and peace and self- live in the world. X*x
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Thank you for your wise words Serenity.
I have grown in the last **** months having compliments on my art work, family and friends saying I should enter them in competitions.
Due to unforeseen circumcises I am (detail removed by Moderator) for two companies, and coping.
I’m eating better than I have for years and people are asking me for recipe ideas and food plans.
If this is happening why I am stuck in the same property my future will fly when I’m free.
FS xx
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Dear Falling Skys, I’m sorry that you are feeling so awful right now. All I can say is that working through these moments and the passing of time will bring you out of this. I know its hard when you are depressed and lethargic, but please try to take care of yourself, healthy eating, exercise, rest etc. I realize that can be very difficult as the stress inside makes you crave things that give you a high, I comfort eat when I am down. After I get my well being back on track I always regret eating all that junkfood. I felt like you are now 5 months ago, i was so depressed. But life does improve i promise you. No Contact is key. X*X
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Thank you HA
I wait for the day when I don’t have his cloud of negativity over me. Because of the way I run my life I’m not often in the house with as the same time of him, but you are always on hyper alert in case he does something.
I workout at least six times a week, I’m making new fiends and have new hobbies, and reinventing myself.
You have given me hope.
FS xx
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Hi con
I have always paid the bills so I know it’s up together. He has started giving me money towards them now. To be honest I’m scared of the fall out if I stop them while we are in the same property. Once I am free I will stop them. Already have a phone in place.
Got you message and have replied.
FS xx
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