Urgent advice for getting out needed please!

[Stormdreamer]

Hi,

I need to get out of this relationship now. It’s been (detail removed by Moderator) years and it’s when he is nasty to my children that pushes me to be so firm in my decision of leaving. However, we have just relocated to a new county, made a brand new life, got a beautiful new home (rented) and my children are so happy and settled. They have been through a lot already and I want to keep things as stable and safe for them as possible. Moving them out of this brand new home that they love so much just doesn’t work for me, we need to stay here.

However… my partner is the one who works, so he pays the rent and bills.

Estate agents don’t accept housing benefit, so I don’t have that as an option. I dont really want him continuing to pay the rent for us to live here because it just means another control thing he’s got over me and it’ll make things worse.

This is what is trapping me, this situation above. I need to get out of this relationship pronto, for my children’s sakes and for my own. I hate how lovely he can be and how fab he can be with the children but then when he turns, he is terrifying and he is nasty and he scares us all. It’s so confusing and why i keep staying.

Please help. I need to get us out.

Thanks in advance.

[thepoppygirl]

Hi StormDreamer.
Have you spoke to WA? They might be able to direct you, and I think they have a solicitor who specialises in domestic abuse. Might be worth a look. Good luck and Stay Strong.
Love,
ThePoppyGirl xx

[Twisted Sister]

Dear Stormdreamer

You don’t need to tell an estate agent. Your HB can be paid direct to you and you pay the landlord/lady.

There are also properties advertised specifically for social housing. If you call WA helpline they can give you contacts in your areagat can plan with you for leaving safely or other options for you to investigate your chances of him being removed and you having a residency to remain there and he leave.

You could also call the Rights of Women who can give you free legal advice on their helpline number.

Warmest wishes ts

[Iwantmeback]

Hi storm dreamer, I understand your reluctance to leave your home. As TS says, estate agents only rent the property out on behalf of the landlords and as long as the landlords gets paid they don’t care where the money comes from. I agree with poppygirl ,WA have their own solicitors who can advise and you’ll get legal aid too.
Look up trauma bonding and FOG, that will help shed light on why you feel confused in the relationship.
Best of luck
IWMB 💕💕

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