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    • #9566
      mixed-up mum
      Participant

      I’m sick fed up of Valentines Day being shoved in your face everywhere you go – all the shops are full of cards, gifts etc.

      It’s on Tv, radio etc, its so hard for those of us who have no one to share it with, no one who cares – and it only serves as a reminder of how alone I am – no one to send me a card, buy me flowers or chocs, no on to take me out for a meal, no one to cuddle up with.

      The media is so full of it, and it sickens me, it just hilights the fact I’m on my own.

      When we were together,to end up with he didn’t bother with making an effort for Valentines Day, and even in previous years when he did bother, he only did it cos he felt he had to, it was forced on him by the media, I could not face buying a card for him in return, for it would have been so fake, it meant nothing to me, I hated him and wanted to get away……

      I know some of you will say you shouldn’t need a man to make you feel loved or feel special – and go out and buy yourself chocs and flowers – you don’t need a man for that….but the thing is it just feels like all couples around me are making an effort to be romantic, and it makes me feel even more alone……

    • #9568
      Confused123
      Participant

      Hey Hun

      Yes it is annoying when u walk into shops and see all these lovey doved up messages and hering about couples arranging romantic eveings with there partner, i just see it as like yours, mine never made effort but expected things in return, yes we havent gor partners at moment, but at least we safe and no one beating us up, messing with our heads, that hold so much value to our wellbeing , when its menat to be written some one will come into our lives, seriously buy yourself choclates to show u value yourself , whats the point in being able to celebrate vaentine with some one that hurts us, i dont have any one but at least imnot getting beaten up which menas so so much to me

    • #9581
      White Rose
      Participant

      Seriously I’d rather buy my own flowers than have the token gesture from the reduced counter that occasionally were bought for me, along with a card that said the same empty message.
      I didn’t get a valentines card or an anniversary card in our last 2 years together, and my Xmas presents were either non existent or something for the home. Birthday was predictable too – “oh lets not go out today on your birthday, I’m a bit tired, lets go next week instead. I’ll get your present tomorrow what would you like” – he was
      Treat yourself to some flowers M.U.M you deserve it x*x

    • #9583
      Ayanna
      Participant

      It is only a day and soon over. I do online shopping and I am not often in shops. So, this did not catch my attention at all. I never had a Valentine’s Day in my entire life. Since I fled I make myself beautiful presents all the time. Do not ask about my credit card, hahaha!

    • #9598
      Serenity
      Participant

      Valentine’s Day was always a painful experience for me, as was my birthday, anniversary and Christmas- because his act of forgetting or poor or cruel present-giving ( yes, he even got me nasty presents) made me upset and depressed.

      Now I can go through Valentine’s Day not having to experience that hurt- which to me is worth a billion red roses.

      Do something special for yourself on this day. X

    • #9604
      Falling Skys
      Participant

      Hi

      I am pleased not to have the card waiting for me expressing undying love l, when I knew it was lies. I would have to be thankful horrible.

      I shall be treating myself lol 😁

      It’s only one day as been said before. We all have days that are harder than others. I was dreading Christmas but it was great it was abuse free. I was grieving for the dreams of what I thought my Christmas was not the reality.

      FS xx

    • #9609
      WanderingCloud
      Participant

      I have given up on expecting anything, even at Christmas he didnt bother. His excuse was that we were away on holiday and would give me money when we got home, how considerate. Even though I am resigned to have married someone who only ever thinks about themselves, it still hurts that despite being with him for 2 decades, he cannot even think about buying something that he knows I would like. Even when he wants to buy me something, he has to ask me what I want and even then, it has to be something that doesnt involve actually making a special shopping trip because ‘he doesnt do shopping’.
      I dont think about it now because if I place too much emphasis on his selfishness, it really hurts me so I avoid putting myself through it.
      Last mothers Day, as usual no mothers day card but can you believe he went beserk when he realsied I hadnt sent his mum a card!! Oh the irony!
      Now I treat myself occasionally to bath oils etc so when I am trying to escape his abuse, at least I can try relax and pamper myself with nice inexpensive things. I think taking care of yourself helps does partly help with the recovery process. xx

    • #9621
      Hopesprings
      Participant

      Valentine’s Day for me when I was with him was always a major disappointment. He loved it of course because phoney affection was what he was all about. I for one am glad I don’t need to pretend to be loved up and spend money on a waste of space this year.

      Valentine’s is nonsense and when you’re in a great loving relationship (with yourself) or another you will realise that.

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