Want to leave but don't want to threaten him

[beachbum]

I want to leave my boyfriend for good, but every time I try to leave him, he finds me again, follows me, attacks me and manipulates those around me to get me to go back to him. I have confined in only one of my close friends, and he says the only way my boyfriend will leave me alone for good is to involve the police and get some form of restraining order. Although it sounds stupid, I don’t want to have to do that to him, even if he’s somewhat ruined my life, I don’t want to ruin his. Does anyone know of any other way, other than police involvement to get him to leave me alone, once and for all.

[KIP.]

You have given him chance after chance to leave you alone. He has shown you that won’t work. Ring the helpline number on here for advice but in my experience these men don’t leave us alone until we hold them accountable. That means police for our own safety. You’re stuck in the FOG of abuse. The Fear Obligation and Guilt. He is not your responsibility. Read up about domestic abusers. They are most dangerous when we leave. He has got his way every time in the past by using these violent tactics. They work for him. He won’t change.

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