Was it my fault?

[Seagulls]

I’ve been really unwell. It’s been a particularly frightening illness and my husband’s been looking after me. We went out (detail removed by Moderator) to get some (detail removed by Moderator). I suddenly got (detail removed by Moderator) and I asked for his help. He was trying to help but was being ineffectual. I got a bit desperate as the (detail removed by Moderator) was severe and swore. He immediately lost his temper and (detail removed by Moderator) very hard so that he hurt me. Usually problems are verbal and emotional so this was different but I’m still not at all well and am feeling vulnerable. I ended up crying (detail removed by Moderator) and he stormed off saying he’d take the car and I’d have to find my own way home. Me swearing caused him to loose his temper so was it my fault he hurt me? He calmed down and came back and we got the (detail removed by Moderator) and went home. I’m so confused.

[Lisa]

Hi Seagulls,

Thank you for sharing with us. I am sorry to hear about what you have been through and whilst you are unwell, it sounds very distressing for you. Abuse can be very confusing and can cause doubts but try to believe in yourself- if something doesn’t feel right then it usually isn’t. Your husband is choosing to behave in this way rather than be supportive and respectful.

Do you have contact with your local domestic abuse service? They can often offer ongoing emotional and practical support. You can find your local service via this link if you feel able to reach out.

Keep posting to us when you can.

Best wishes,

Lisa

[Author]

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