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    • #63344
      IChooseLove
      Participant

      I properly ended an emotionally & sexually abusive relationship about (Detail removed by Moderator) ago and have been going really strong until these last few months. He would interact/contact me in any kind of way every so often during that (Detail removed by Moderator) but I would always ignore him/completely shut things down and even changed my number. However in the last few months I’ve really felt like talking to him again and have made attempts to do so. I feel so silly for trying to get in contact with him again after everything he’s done. I know and recognise how abusive he is and that this is all part of the process but I still feel like I just want to talk to him. & I feel even more silly for how he sees me now that I’m trying to get in contact with him. I don’t know what to do, I’m trying to fight the feeling of reaching out but I think about it all day every day. I still think about him 24/7 and it’s been that way for (Detail removed by Moderator); I’ve just been strong enough to not act on it, until recently.

    • #63345
      KIP.
      Participant

      Hi there. Have you received counselling? The hooks of abuse are very strong. Ask yourself what you truly think you will get from re engaging with an abuser? You won’t get any closure. Ending a relationship is like breaking a drug habit I think. Cravings will come and go but the main thing is zero contact with the substance. Please block him again and start from the beginning. Distract yourself. Have you been on the Freedom Programme with Women’s Aid? Try to do that course. Nothing good will come from re engaging with an abuser. He has shown you his true colours. Believe him.

      • #63348
        IChooseLove
        Participant

        Hi, thanks for the reply.

        I am currently having counselling and have mentioned this to them and they advised me to come on this, so that I can talk to people on here instead of turning to him for communication.

        I know that I won’t gain anything good from talking to him which is why I get so annoyed and angry at myself for still trying to contact him again. and I hate that I think about him every single day, it’s draining and I don’t want to think about him because he’s already consumed so many years of my life and even when I went no contact and hardly ever spoke for (Detail removed by Moderator), I still spent my time thinking about him even when I tried not to. It just feels like it’s never ending.

        and no I haven’t been on the freedom programme, I will check that out now. Thank you.

      • #63349
        IChooseLove
        Participant

        and no I haven’t been on the freedom programme, I will check that out now. Thank you.

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