- This topic has 2 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 11 months ago by Bananaboat.
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7th October 2023 at 11:19 am #162202HugsAndStuffParticipant
Hi all,
Just wanted to post about an event that’s upset me, basically.
X (family member) was shouting at me and calling me the usual; selfish, inconsiderate, stuff along those lines. I was simply asking them not to shout at me.
I went to the bathroom and they followed, and waited in the kitchen / when I left the bathroom they were still verbally having a go at me and I wasn’t making eye contact, and tried to step around them. They stepped in front of me and prevented me from leaving, they did this two or three times.I’m used to being shouted at, but being blocked from leaving the room really panicked me and reminded me of my ex perp as well.
What would this be called? Its not physical harm or anything like that x
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7th October 2023 at 11:54 am #162204BlueberryFieldParticipant
It is not a physical harm, but it is a form of an emotional abuse. It is normal to have an argument in a family or a relationship, but when you clearly want to leave the room, to give time to that person to calm down and clear your own head so hopefully later on you can work things out, without being heated emotionally and that person stops you from doing this and still keeps putting you down, especially calling you names I personally think it is emotional abuse. My partner keeps doing this. I want to leave the room or just have a few minutes of peace to calm myself and let him to calm down, but he either wouldn’t let me leave the room or would follow me around the house harassing me emotionally.
My best advice would be just trying to explain to them that in these situations if they could just sit down with you and explain what is bothering them so you can find a compromise and work things out, so both sides are happy. And if you want to leave the room, for them not to follow you or especially block your exit, because it triggers some things from bad past experiences with your ex
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7th October 2023 at 2:57 pm #162220BananaboatParticipant
Intimidation, verbal abuse, using his size/strength to dominate you. All of it is abuse. The bit of your post that really struck me is where you say, ‘I’m used to being shouted at’, you shouldn’t be. Have you read ‘why does he do that’ by Lundy Bancroft it might help identify some of these behaviours and why they do them x
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