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    • #10176
      Ayanna
      Participant

      … my PTSD comes to life. Flashbacks intensify. I hear his voice. Every shadow scares me to death. I lock all the windows and doors and hope nobody breaks into the house. This fear starts every time darkness comes. Any noise prevents me from falling asleep. I am shaken. I am so scared. My place is peaceful and we have CCTV. I do not know why I have this recurring fear. And then these nightmares, often I wake up from my own screams. What a life is that ….

    • #10177
      KIP.
      Participant

      Hi there, I went through the same. I still sleep with the radio and a light on. That way when I wake up scared, the radio draws my attention. I’ve recently had to move the bedroom furniture around again. That helps too. You’re not alone. The damage these men do is shocking and it’s no surprise it takes years to heal. Don’t be hard on yourself. I’ve just got up an made a cuppa❤️ I’ve also rang the helpline or the samaratains in the past. Just to hear a friendly voice x

    • #10178
      Jelly bean
      Participant

      I don’t have any experience of what you’re going through but I didn’t want to read and run. Sending massive hugs your way 💜

    • #10241
      Ayanna
      Participant

      Thank you both. Yes, KIP, I do this as well, I keep a light on and often have music playing in the background. Before I met him I could sleep anytime anywhere. Now I am a sleepless nervous wreck with uncontrollable flashbacks. 🙁

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