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    • #143545
      longjourneylife
      Participant

      Young child wanting their dad, hard to know what to say…

    • #143560
      longjourneylife
      Participant

      Turns out it was only a brief, tired moment, but know as time goes on, questions will be asked. He chose to abuse, he was in control of his anger whilst we all ran around trying to make him ‘happy’, we were his puppets, he made ussad and he blamed us for everything, yet he is still their dad…

      • #144129
        DeadDiamondX
        Participant

        Hey,
        This is something I can really relate too..!
        And I understand how your feeling & yes it’s so hard but us strong a*s mummy’s will some how find a way to get off the conversation and keep going for them because after all they are innocent in the situations.
        I feel for the children in every single situation that’s on this site including my own because they don’t need it neither May they might not understand.
        I just wanted to say you have got this and I honestly do believe in every single powerful woman on this page that has took the first step to reach out talk to others ask for questions but also fixing their souls and Lives . Rebuilding my life!! Very inspiring and the emotions you’re feeling for your children natural as a good parent would feel that it’s very hard! That makes you one bad a*s strong mummy .. Be proud xx

    • #143566
      KIP.
      Participant

      When Dad Hurts Mom is a great book by Lundy Bancroft. The NSPCC have a great helpline too. Kids are often easily distracted so if it comes up again try some distraction techniques, let’s get the colouring books out etc. they are very resilient but my advice would be to be consistent and don’t cover for his behaviour, don’t defend his behaviour. They need to know that there care consequences as children from abusive homes are far more likely to be abused as adults. You could say Daddy hurt mummy so he is not allowed to come here just now. It can be a good life lesson, I know it’s not ideal but I wish I learned early that not everyone who is biologically linked had my best interests at heart. Just hang in there and get into a new routine that suits you and your family, not him 💕. Lots of help out there, local womens aid, NSPCC, police domestic abuse unit, check out local clubs and charities.

    • #143636
      longjourneylife
      Participant

      So helpful, thank you tonnes. Funny that I didn’t think daddy hurting mummy was enough of a reason, I’ve managed to believe I’m that unimportant! But without me, the kids are a lot worse off, do guess I can’t be that bad… Wow, the damage these me do. He may have robbed m youth, but not my children’s, or any of our futures x*x

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