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    • #20625
      Ayanna
      Participant

      The woman I spoke to yesterday said she would have never let him touch her. She would have been out at the first sign.
      I believe her.
      He knows her. She was my bridesmaid. He said to me that he would be never be able to tolerate a woman like her. He did not like her.

      She is a very decent and hard working woman, like me.

      Her self confidence is high, unlike mine. She does not bend to people’s wishes, unlike me. She appears to be cold sometimes, unlike me. She has tight personal limitations, unlike me. She only lets people into her life that are successful and achieving, unlike me. She does not share what belongs to her, unlike me.

      The abusers choose their victims.
      They know which woman would fall for them.
      They do not try those who they know they would not put up with them.
      They sense this after a few conversations.

      I told her that I have changed. She saw that I am different now. She noticed that my personal limitations are even tighter than hers.

    • #20628

      I admire your friend, that is how I aspire to be, we will all get there eventually with the right desire & support. X

    • #20631
      Serenity
      Participant

      You have become stronger, Ayanna.

      We mustn’t feel shame at having given to our partners. Some people in this world aren’t able to give at all. We were able to. We just gave to the wrong men.

      Abusers hate strong, bolshy women. My sisters and mum are more bolshy than me, and my ex had a real problem with them.

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