Why can’t i just move on.

[theSunflower]

So I was in an abusive relationship for (detail removed by moderator)

I’ve now moved on with my life. Moved out of the house, Moved out of the City, New job, New partner…
but everyday I still feel like he’s in my head. Still apologising for every little thing I do, jumping at noises, flinching when someone moves to fast. Its been 2 years, when will this end? when will I wake up one day and not hear the horrible comments from him in my head about my appearance or being a failure. When will I stop looking at my partner and hearing my abusers voice in my head telling me he no doesn’t love me, that I’m not good enough? i’m a complete anxious wreck.

Does anyone have any advice, coping methods or kind words?

thank you in advance.

[HopeLifeJoy]

Hi theSunflower

Well done for having moved on, this takes a lot of effort and determination, so you can be very proud of yourself.

I would call your GP and tell her about how you still feel, about the anxiety especially, about his words still in your head…sounds like you need to process all of this maybe with a counsellor. When you dissect your reactions and thoughts it takes away the power they hold over you and can then be replaced by a positive confident self image. This will help you to move on.

Sending you a hug 💞 and keep posting

[Butterflyboo]

Ah TheSunflower, it’s hard isn’t it? It sounds like you’re doing really well, but I get what you mean about the anxiety. Have you thought about having some counselling? x

[fizzylem]

Yeah I was going to say that too, this is for counselling; you’ve moved a long way, but now you need to free your mind hey; put his voice to bed, find your own voice – your true self – feel content in the world again with yourself and others. This can be achieved in therapy. Check out the BACP website for counselling and psychotherapy – will give you advice on the questions you need to consider when choosing a therapist either in the NHS, via a charity or privately x

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