Why did I pick up my phone?!

[I am better than this]

He called me and I answered. He doesn’t often call and it’s difficult not to answer when we have a child together, I don’t know if he’s calling about access. After this time though, I will not be answering again!! Am fuming with the audacity of the man!

He had been told about photos that appeared on social media, taken in a restaurant of myself and many others celebrating a birthday. I happened to be sat next to a male. He’s laid the law down saying as our sons father, he has a right to know when I start seeing someone!! This is coming from a man who cheated on me for couple months with a cheating married woman who was happy to give him sex from the off, on the marital bed whilst her hubby was away working and her kids slept in adjoining rooms. This is the same man who actually used our son to meet up for some of his liaisons with her! The same man who lied for months about why we’d split up, telling me he’d met no one and was single. The same man who’s tart called me herself to tell me the truth about the affair and that they were having a baby together! The same man who takes our son with sensory issues to her home on access days, and lies to me about that because we’d agreed in mediation that until our son was assessed and diagnosed, we wouldn’t put extra c**p on him.
This man who’s done all this …….demands rights as a father, to know when I am dating someone!!!
He threatened me with court on the phone and threatened to cancel our sons christening that I have arranged. He says that because he hadn’t signed anything agreeing to it, he has rights to stop it. I just burst into tears…out of frustration and told him to go ahead and do what you gotta do. Take me to court o don’t care anymore. I told him I was taking our son to church to have him christened and he can have police there to stop me if he feels it’s needed but that he’s the one who will look like a d**k. I told him he was a bullying, manipulative and evil man and that I didn’t fear anything he threw at me anymore. He changed tactics and started that sweet talking nice voiced man again. At which point I said I no longer wanted to carry on talking. Said goodbye and hung up.

I don’t believe he will stop the christening but he may take me to court. He’s always throwing that threat at me. It’s making me so nervy.

I am organising counselling for myself because I’m so stressed that it’s starting to make me a miserable mum around our gorgeous boy who needs better than this right now.
I’m so disappointed in myself.

[Ayanna]

Call Rights of Women. As you are not together you can do what you like and see as many men as you like. I doubt that he has any right to know this.

How can he cancel the christening when you arranged it? I cannot see this happening. You could tell him not to come because he does not behave appropriately. And you could let all the guests know that he is not welcome. How about that?

If he takes you to court you cannot prevent it. But you can get information beforehand from Rights of Women.
Also, get in touch with your local WA.

[I am better than this]

Hi Ayanna,

He’s saying that as he is his father and I have nothing in writing, he can shut down the christening. Even though members of his family are to be god parents too. But he hasn’t realised I have text messages from him that show that not only did he agree to it, he’s the one who sorted the venue for the party afterwards. I set up everything with the church. So I think he’d look stupid trying to pull the plug on the christening.

It’s all control tactics with him. I’m not like him. Or the tart he’s with now. I have morals and always put my child before myself, something neither of them have done once since they met each other. He thinks I’m sitting around waiting for him. I’m not and never will. Of course he has no rights knowing if and when I start dating! Double standards on his part I think. He just can’t handle the fact I may move on and that a potential new partner may be such a positive influence in our sons life, it will eventually show him up to be the foul person he truly is!! He’s a control freak. But he still upsets me and I’m angry with myself about that.

[Author]

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