Why do I still feel guilty

[Borntobefree]

It’s been quit a while since I left my abuser ..
Iam in a much better place now than before
But why do I still feel guilty I could not see through him till his mask totaly slipped
The thing is . I still read the review the police sent.. I was made out to be the one who had an obbesion with him not the other way about
I never spoke up about the abuse till the fog cleared ….. it was purely mind f*k
When I was with him ..
Maybe Iam the problem because. I grew up being abused that’s all I know .. pufft

[Malachite]

You’re not the problem, the police and your abusers are.

I’m sorry that you feel guilty, he must have been very clever and manipulating. Maybe you feel guilty because that’s a feeling abusers seem to try to use a lot to get their way? Therefore, it’s a feeling you associate with him? I think it’s normal not to realise someone’s abusing you unless they’re physically hurting you frequently.

[KIP.]

Hey there. Your self confidence is still recovering and when it fully recovers you will realise simply that some police are just idiots. They have zero understanding of domestic abuse. Some men and just predators and abusers. And we had no experience of this. Who would have thought the person closest to us was out to harm us. It just doesn’t make sense unless you’ve been through it. Hang in there and stop reading the review the police sent. It’s not worth the paper it’s written on. Use it instead of toilet paper. It means nothing apart from just how much
the system need changing.

[SunshineRainflower]

I think all abusers are experts and creating that feeling of guilt. I felt it constantly with my ex. I wasn’t too attracted to him at first but he acted like a hurt little boy who really liked me so I thought I needed to give him a chance because I felt so bad hurting him. It is so confusing when they act like this while lying, cheating and abusing. They know that acting like the victim is the perfect cover for their behaviour.

I only saw through my ex when he got really scary one night and threatened me. I then looked back over the relationship and gradually realised what he was, I felt unbelievably sick and horrified and still struggle with it. It’s so awful when you realise you weren’t in a mutually caring relationship. Have you had any counselling?

[Borntobefree]

Hi thanks for the comments
Ye I’ve been in councilling I’ve just finished a 12 week trauma therapy. It has helped me .why Iam attracting the wrong sorts .

Lol @kip toilet paper great idea

I just can’t wait for the day he gets caught

And the police apologise to me

But he’s so b****y clever

[KIP.]

They are not clever they are arrogant and it’s their arrogance that’s their downfall. Just sit back and wait x

[Author]

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