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    • #124870
      Enoughsenoughs
      Participant

      So I left my alcoholic husband end of (detail removed by Moderator) and after the (detail removed by Moderator) week my children went back to him and I was left as the visiting parent. My husband went t total from the day I left and completely change and done the complete opposite to what I thought he would do and he swear t me off my feet again made me fall back in love with him he has now ripped me sort again he has started drinking again and I’ve never felt so lonely in my life but I’ve learnt I have to stay if not I have to walk away from my children and I can’t do that again I’m broke and there’s no way to fix me I have just got to learn to carry on and make the beats of what I’ve got I wish I never trusted him again I wish my children loved me as I do them but I can’t change any of it

    • #124882
      KIP.
      Participant

      Hey there. Have you contacted your local women’s aid. Abuse is complicated and I don’t think it’s because the kids love him more. Sometimes children side with an abuser because they fear them. Talk to the police about having him removed from the property so that you can stay there with the kids. Keep all the evidence you can of his abusive behaviour. Keep a secret journal. Tell your GP. Talk to a solicitor (most offer free initial advice). I fought to stay in my home. The kids probably just want to stay in a place they know that feels normal to them. Gather a support team around you. Meantime play his game but in the background gather enough evidence to have him removed. Have you read the book Living with the Dominator by Pat Craven? Abusing you is also child abuse and may well affect their mental health in adulthood. Children from abusive homes are far more likely to become abusers or be abused as adults. Keep reaching out for help. Educate yourself and get all your ducks in a row. Look at a non molestation order or occupation order. Rights of Women have a helpline with free legal advice and there’s the national domestic abuse helpline which is 24/7. There’s also an online chat facility on here. You’re not alone x

    • #133983
      Enoughsenoughs
      Participant

      Thank you for all the information. I feel completely drained and have cried more then I ever have in my life he makes my life a living hell I hate him more than I’ve ever hated anyone no matter what I do it’s never enough. He twists everything I say or do. He uses my children to get what he wants and even says things like they love there dad that’s why they came back to me. I can’t see another out I done it I had a house money in the bank and I went back to him I have every up and I’m back to where I was but properly worse. Im at an all time low at the minute and just don’t no what to do I can’t do another (detail removed by Moderator) years when my daughter will be old enough I really do feel like a little lost child who just needs rescuing xx

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