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    • #124149
      Chipstix
      Participant

      It’s been (detail removed by moderator).. since the police took us away.. the physical abuse stopped but the mental and emotional abuse continued.. even to this day I am still being effected. It was only (detail removed by moderator) that I saw his face…we had (detail removed by moderator), I was  (detail removed by moderator)  pregnat with my 2nd child..not his (my ex). He (detail removed by moderator)..I should be happy? (detail removed by moderator) he told my solicitors he will take me back through court again..he will fight until he gets his way. He wouldn’t take the drug test he admitted he took drugs..he refused to go on the (detail removed by moderator) course.. he did malicious lies about me and my new partner he has never even met.. we had proof (detail removed by moderator).. he has destroyed my life..and continues to destroy my future… fist pregnancy ruined by him and second tarnished by him with all the stress (detail removed by moderator).. I am constantly angry.. anything can set me off.. with a mixture of postnatal depression some days I just can’t cope.. current partner has been patient but his patience is running out.. we are pretending to be happy families this Easter because (detail removed by moderator) we fell out..I’m sleep deprived, alone.. sad all the time and worried my ex will send me court papers again.. I can not move on… some days I’m happy.. most days I’m not.. I can’t focus.. my children are suffering.. do I just keep talking about it.. do I need a therapist? I find talking about it (detail removed by moderator) on is just reminding me .. I’ve blocked him..erased him from everywhere.. my daughter is scared of him because of his behaviour.. I’m so thankful for caffcass.. her school are giving her support because for the first (detail removed by moderator) of her life his behaviour was horrific… he will never understand the damage.. I hope she can be fixed..they reassure me she will… I don’t know if I ever will be…
      I feel to blame.. I should of walked away, I’m ashamed I even got involved now my children will be forever affected… Will I ever be happy again…?

    • #124151
      Empoweredhealing
      Participant

      Hi there, yes you can be happy and at peace again! But the road there is a lot of hard work. The work will be internal as you turn your focus and effort inward and take care of the parts of yourself that has been abused and neglected.
      Please talk to your GP. Therapy is a really good step. Posting on here took courage. And the more you open up about what has happened and continue to happen, the more you’ll see yourself in other women’s experience. And that’s healing in itself.

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