This topic contains 6 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  Anonymous 5 months, 2 weeks ago.

  • Author
  • #70454

    I’m always on the alert for how things are between me and my ex, plus a bit for his new lady. He did seem to be getting a bit more friendly, which worried me.

    Lo was so happy telling me that now daddy has moved he walks past my home every day, several times.

    Just had to explain to the school that the ‘mummy’ she had to call an ambulance for was not me.

    I can’t do any more for the new lady. I warned her that he was dangerous. Now she goes nowhere without him.

    Due to her illness she only leaves the house with him and he works from home so there is no escape.

    I know he is playing her illness as he played mine. Everyone thinks he is wonderful looking after her.

  • #70456

    I would report the walking past your house multiple times a day to the police. That sounds like stalking to me. Particularly if he works from home. I can’t imagine what he could have to do that would require him to walk past your house multiple times a day.

  • #70460

    I’m not sure of your circumstances or if the new lady went to hospital because of an attack but you can ask the police to go round and do a welfare check (anonymously). You can give a statement to the police of the abuse you suffered at his hands (if you feel it’s safe to do so). I would definitely report anything out of the ordinary as I can imagine his next move will be to ‘pop in’. As he was just passing. There is no such thing as a coincidence with these men.

  • #70472

    I don’t think he will pop in. He moved from (detail removed by moderator), so he now has an excuse to walk past.
    The school have done a welfare check on me, so presumably they will try to do one with the new lady. I’m worried that if I try to call the police to ask for a welfare check he will work out it was me.
    I tried to report him to the police in the past, but they called and said they believed him over me.

  • #70473

    It’s not your word against his when he does it to other women. If you have given them a statement then you have your side on record so if they find out he’s been abusing her too then your statement will help prove it, sadly, perhaps she is now in the fog of abuse. However I wouldn’t be allowing my child to be near a violent man who puts his new gf in hospital and my child witnesses it, that’s child abuse and I think you would have a great chance to prevent further contact with your lo. She will be traumatised and it will affect her later in life. I hope she’s receiving counselling x

  • #70475

    Will call later when I get a chance. Lo already gets counselling at school.

  • #70486

    Well, that was a waste of time. The police said they could do nothing, and if I was worried about my lo I should contact social services.
    I have the school keeping an eye on lo because court banned me from talking about what was done to me and I feel completely useless as a mum. I tell her that she can call me at any time but it doesn’t feel enough.
    My body feels the pain years later of what was done and my mind remembers the fear, yet apparently I wanted to be hurt.
    I’m supposed to sit around and pretend that nothing happened and therefore I never have to worry it will happen again?

You must be logged in to reply to this topic.


© 2015 Women's Aid Federation of England – Women’s Aid is a company limited by guarantee registered in England No: 3171880.

Women’s Aid is a registered charity in England No. 1054154

Terms & conditionsPrivacy & cookie policySite mapProtect yourself onlineMedia │ Jobs

Log in with your credentials


Forgot your details?

Create Account