Chasingthelight

[Chasingthelight]

I was saddened to read what you have been through, and I definitely recognise in your stories abusive behaviour I have experienced myself and when your husband is a figure of authority or importance it is especially hard. Everyone will back him up and make excuses for him but it is abusive. The forgotten key story is so similar to what happened to me once and the wages story the same. We read these stories and it’s like we are reading our own. I hope you get help moving forward and knowing you are not alone.

[Chasingthelight]

A man who’s needs can never be met, who is in constant need of praise, who tells you how you have abused him over the years, … It’s a familiar story for many of us, and it feels like there is no way out. We have to find a way to survive this whether we find the courage to leave or whether we find a way to get up and carry on with our lives how they are which requires just as much courage, but remember we are not alone and this is what gives us the strength to continue knowing we will never be alone in this fight. Stay strong

[Chasingthelight]

Thank you so much everybody for your words and support, it just helps me realise I am not alone and I can do this. Some days it’s fine but other days I just need to hear this ❤️ x

[Chasingthelight]

I still find it hard to believe we are all such in these similar circumstances going round in the same circles. It’s hard to give advice because we all try so many different ways to escape or to just cope with every day. Just knowing we are all in it and that we aren’t waking alone helps, I hope that comforts you too. I used to think of the good times outway the bad then it’s ok but I have got the balance tipped the other way now. I told me partner I no longer want the relationship but I am not moving out and living together because neither will move makes things so difficult when he tries to come close to you in the night and pretend everything’s ok. I’m standing my ground but you know they are going to get to you in the end. In my case not because I love him anymore or that I believe he will change or that I believe he is sorry because mine never says sorry but because he is big and powerful and overpowers me. I think you sound like there are still positives for you and you keep hold of those and like the above post you know your inner voice, listen to your instincts. I agree with previous posts that a councillor might be a good idea, I am starting seeing somebody this week and I hope that helps. Just sad that we have to support our health because of someone else’s issues, it’s all wrong. I would love it if we could all end the cycles and stay strong get out and be safe, no more knowing what’s coming and fearing it xx

[Chasingthelight]

I can relate so much to this, I am still here many years into this abusive relationship/marriage going through the same cycles over and over, everybody says walk but I can’t I have a family and pets that I would never leave with him, why should I walk and in advised without another abusive threat on my life I can’t get him out, i can see now that this will go on and on and I can’t break the loop even though I say I am not going to participate in a relationship even though we live in the same house. They don’t see it, they think we can forgive but you can’t forget the abuse, two days ago I was told so many nasty things relating me to something bad, I can’t write it down, but how can somebody who’s meant to love and protect you do this to you. Stay strong, those days when you feel most alone and unable to climb out of bed remember we are all United and you are not alone x

[Chasingthelight]

Please hang on in there, I am sorry to hear what you are going through and I hope you find some help with this. You are not alone there are lots of us here going through this same feeling every day, we can be strong together. I know what you mean about barely functioning, it’s hard to eat drink even breathe properly when things are bad and it’s hard to understand why we have been put on earth to be tortured like this but I read here how people are getting out of the bad situation and surviving and there is something better. Just keep going and I hope you get some help with this next step 🙏

[Chasingthelight]

I can relate to this so much too, i think you can’t help thinking what would have been and did I waste my life with the choices I made but you have come so far, you are safe, and that’s amazing but it doesn’t mean you are going to feel amazing every day, there are going to be hard days. I know it’s difficult for me to comment as I am still in the situation I haven’t escaped but I do keep thinking if I had wished things different and not met him I wouldn’t have these amazing kids etc etc, and they shape who you are, they make you a better person because they aren’t better people. Things don’t just mend overnight including our hearts and our mental health but you will get there, hang in xx

[Chasingthelight]

I am also sad and sorry to hear this, and agree with tiredofitall who has such very good advice. I am always amazed at how they turn things around so that what they do to you they tell you you are doing to them and they play the victim when they are definitely not the victim. I am saddened to hear you feel uncomfortable in your own home, I know how this feels, your home should be your safe place. I go to my daughter’s room or find a quiet spot and play calming music and read a book, just thinking of you, stay strong

[Author]

Posts