fearful feather

[fearful feather]

I just wanted to reply, probably not to help, but to empathise with the dawning reality that I have too ended up in an abusive relationship because I had normalised the behaviour I was subjected to as a child by my mother. I literally jumped out of the frying pan into the fire. (detail removed by moderator) and having worked hard at a marriage that I compensated all of my personality, hopes and dreams, as well as money, thinking that “it’s me” with this niggling tooth ache of unhappiness, it all came to a head upon the death of my father and my mother’s constant demanding from me, in the line of “duty”. (detail removed by moderator). my mother is a total demanding, soul destroying woman who leaves me feeling wretched. She makes me feel obligated, yet tells me I have ruined her life, created so many problems, despite my husband being charged it is my fault and she would rather have gone to my funeral than be “dragged in” to my divorce (which I have never shared any of my fears, worries etc) she has never asked me if I am ok or said a simple thank you for any of the many, many things I drop everything of mine to do for her. Right now, I feel very alone and hated for standing my ground and I have no idea what will happen with the CPS etc in respect of my husband as I don’t know anyone who has been through any of this. (detail removed by moderator), but my mother won’t even acknowledge that this isn’t my own doing and I haven’t somehow made up the whole thing just to upset her. Sorry to hijack your post Weather, I hope things improve for you <3

[fearful feather]

Thank you for sharing your post. I am embarking on a similar journey (noting this is an over 50’s thread and I have been married to my husband for (detail removed by Moderator) years) Every asset I have is joint. I have had to flee the family home, but he is still living there. There is police involvement as my husband has been arrested for stalking and harassment but, like you, I have no means of financial support for the here and now as I am a long way off getting a divorce finalised and I am lost what to do in the meantime. My husband and I also worked together, so I have had to abandon that too so have no means of independent income. Even that I see now as basically an unpaid secretarial role and I just don’t know how I even got to this.

[fearful feather]

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply, your words really do make a difference!!!

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