Feelingroovy

[Feelingroovy]

Thank you for that. I know you’re right! Just finding it a bit difficult right now. I’m continually doubting myself. I need to find some strength. I’m waiting to hear from a women’s aid counsellor – she’s going to get me into a program to help rebuild my confidence and try to sort my way out of this mess. Xx

[Feelingroovy]

I don’t get the feeling he is doing this for himself. My impression is that he just wants us back together. He says he was never controlling because he let me go where I wanted and never held me back. He says he accepts he was emotionally abusive but then asks for specific examples. I told him I’d read him my diary which I started when I was trying to make some sense of all this, but he doesn’t want that.
I’m sure he’ll try to manipulate any counsellor he goes to see – I’ve never seen anything like the genuine-seeming charm of the man! Maybe I just need to say ‘feel free to get help, God knows you need it, but we’re finished regardless’ so at least I can start to feel like I’m moving on?!

[Feelingroovy]

I think I must be grieving. I feel so low. At the start I was loving the freedom from criticism and anger so much! And telling my friends and family the truth finally was liberating and made me feel close to them and loved again. This is like the big come down after a high. I suppose it just takes time…. Have told him not to contact me until he’s started counselling, but I’m not sure he’ll be able to stick to that. He’s very good at playing the sympathy card, and I know it will only make me feel worse.

[Feelingroovy]

Yes, I think you’re right. I’ve been ignoring my inner voice for years and now it’s screaming ‘run!’. I don’t know why I feel so guilty. Xx

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