Fractured Rainbow

[Fractured Rainbow]

Thank you. The more I think about it, the more little memories pop up and I think you’re right. With the divorce he’s gone on the attack and I just feel any response I have now discredits me and plays right into his hands but I also think he’s conditioned me to feel that way – that he’s right, I’m wrong – so I need to recognise that and work through it I think.

[Fractured Rainbow]

I think it’s preferred that we thrash it out in mediation or failing that through solicitors. He’s stopped mediation but I think once he realises how much it will cost otherwise he will come back to it. I hate mediation with him, it makes me really uncomfortable.

[Fractured Rainbow]

Compromise on grounds sounds good. I want him to just disappear but obviously that won’t happen. I need to get myself together I think. A good shake and get my backside in gear. I am seeing a new solicitor so I think that will help.

[Fractured Rainbow]

I’ve realised that reads wrong. My ex husband is suspected of being on the autistic spectrum. That’s what he always told me anyway. Although now I say it out loud I am actually questioning it. I’ve just accepted that as true, maybe it’s actually not?? For goodness sake, I’m questioning blooming everything!!!

You’re right. There isn’t much fight in me at the moment. I just feel flat. It’s strange, I used to be able to muster it. I need it back! Seeing my new solicitor next week, hopefully that will help too.

[Fractured Rainbow]

Thank you. I will try those books. I’ve had the Freedom Programme recommend to me too?

[Fractured Rainbow]

@fizzylem Yes, I’m away from him. It feels like he’s ever present though. It’s been (detail removed by Moderator) months now. Finances are tricky to resolve. He earns 10 times my salary but it is all allocated elsewhere. Mediation didn’t move forward and now he’s refusing it…well, it will take longer. I did go through the CSA for child maintenance as he said he couldn’t afford it and we couldn’t survive without it otherwise. They were great. I had to find us a flat, private renting, as the family home was a)being sold and b) I couldn’t live there. We were with my parents while he was abroad then functionally homeless. He didn’t agree with my rental costs. I didn’t expect him to or to contribute, so he’s forced me to turn to the state. But we have our own home which we love. Then he cancelled the house sale. Instead of waiting the 2 years for divorce he has now filed claiming my unreasonable behaviour, including an extravagant lifestyle (I shop in charity shops) this is because I once went over budget on our child’s birthday. My solicitor seems quite passive. Said to just agree the divorce, not the reasons. I think I will need a new solicitor as I agree I think it should be on grounds of his adultery.

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