Heart in hand

[Heart in hand]

I have now spoken to local DA service and they are really supportive. The safeguarding team at social services phoned me too because of the police coming out. That freaked me out but she was very helpful. She reassured me that from what I’m telling her I’m doing everything possible as a responsible parent. I gave her permission to view the police report and to write to my daughters school explaining the situation and asking them for support for my daughter. I’m still scared. My partner went out earlier for ages telling our daughter he had an appointment. Don’t know what that is about but trying not to worry. Thank you all for responding, it is helping me through this anxious time. I really appreciate it.

[Heart in hand]

My ex came down this morning and was asking me if I want to talk. I kept quiet and wouldn’t respond to him. He then informed me that he’d tried to talk to me but since I refused he had no choice but to end our joint tenancy, meaning we would both have to leave the property. I left the house immediately and called the housing to tell them what he was threatening. They had a record of me phoning a few weeks ago for advice on DA. The person was very reassuring and said that the behaviour was bullying and abuse. He told me not to worry, they wouldn’t see us out in the street. If he tried to end tenancy they would assess if I could take over as sole tenant or find my daughter and I alternative accommodation. I’m still waiting for a call back from local DA service to help me with a plan in what to do next.

[Heart in hand]

I appreciate all your support so much. I’m really scared right now. I spoke to women’s aid and they advised me on some options. Gave me a no. For a local DA service that could give me practical help. I left a msg for a call back but they haven’t got back to me yet. I also filled in their online referral form explaining the situation. I hope they get back to me soon. I really don’t know what will happen. He just went out and I know he will be doing everything he can to make me look crazy and a bad mum.
I don’t have contact with my family. We’ve moved a lot so I have no local friends.

[Heart in hand]

Thank you for responding. (Detail removed by Moderator) there was an incident. My partner was angry and lashing out verbally. Calling me an abuser and a psycho. Said I was a neglectful mother. My daughter had gone into the bedroom and he went in too closing and locking the door after them. I told him to open the door and let me in to see our daughter. He refused so I said I would call the police if he didn’t let me see her. He opened the door but was furious. Our daughter had gone into a cupboard because of what was happening. He raised his hand threatenly as if to hit me but instead he hit himself hard in the face. He then started yelling (Detail removed by Moderator). This really frightened me. I opened the cupboard and our daughter was freaked out asking me if I just hit daddy. I didn’t think she would believe me because they are close. But she did and I took her downstairs. I locked the living room door because I just didn’t know what he was going to do next. My daughter was begging me not to call the police because she didn’t want daddy to get arrested. But I was so worried I called 101. They sent two officers out to check on us and one went upstairs to talk to my ex. I’m fairly sure he was calm and polite with them and they probably think I made it all up. They left advising me to call again if things escalate. I rang WA today and told them what happened. They have a number for local DV service and I left a msg but they haven’t called back. I feel sick. I don’t know how to carry on living here after (Detail removed by Moderator). Ex is just carrying on as if nothing happened.

[Heart in hand]

Thank you so much for reading. I’m just feeling like I have nowhere to turn. He flips between being nice and horrible. I’m confused and doubting whether I’m just blowing things out of proportion. I don’t feel able to report it as abuse because no one sees it and he probably seems like the rational one.

[Heart in hand]

Thank you. I have phoned women’s aid when things have been particularly bad. But he makes me feel guilty that he will be homeless. This upsets our daughter who takes his side. I fear no one will believe me.

[Heart in hand]

Thank you for your replies and advice. I’m just so tired. But I appreciate the support.

[Heart in hand]

My daughter asked me if it’s OK to go to away (in the UK) with dad. It was late so I told her we’ll talk about it another time. Ex was annoyed and said “why wouldn’t she be allowed to come?”. I just said we’ll talk about it another time and went downstairs. Can he take her without my permission?

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