I think being a Mum to an abusive child is the hardest thing I have had to get my head round. I have had NC with my eldest son in two years for things he has done. I watched him change from a lovely little boy to a very dark teenager who would light fires in the house, abuse the dog, steal cars, rob shops, take drugs every day and I waited…hoping he would come out the other side which he never did. I got therapists who told me he had ADHD and oppositional defiant disorder. Special school….nothing worked. Today he is an active violent pedophile and extremely abusive and manipulative one at that. I think it took me too long to go. I honestly believe that if I had said enough much much sooner perhaps he would have been helped but definately I and my other children would have suffered much less. but hindsight is 20/20 isnt it and when a parent stays because they can fix the abusive child it is not much different than saying we can fix our other abusers when we stay. It is just very hard as a Mum to live with the guilt of saying I quit here.
