thoughtful

[thoughtful]

Thank you all of you so much for your lovely kind replies into cried when I read them, it gives me hope it really does and I feel so much more determined to get away from this living he’ll. Because it has happened to me in a previous relationship I keep getting told by him that ithe must be me that makes them do it as they both said they had never been violent in any of their old relationships. When you get told something constantly you start to believe it but I know now it’s not my fault. Nobody deserves to be beaten and tormented by anybody, and it is torment walking on eggshells having to watch everything I say or do in case it is the wrong thing and it will set him off. And the constant accusations of cheating, I would be happy to never be with a man again for the rest off my life. Thank you all again it really is helping me knowing I am not alone. I will keep you all updated as often as is possible.

[thoughtful]

I had some news today, his elderly father had a fall at home, he is in the early stages of dementia. The hospital won’t release him home on his own so he is coming to stay with us. This is good news for me (I know that sounds terrible ) because him doesn’t start when anybody else is around. To everyone he is a lovely man. His dad is a lovely man so I am quite happy to have him at home with us. I am slowly making plans to leave and am feeling a bit better I know I will get there in the end, and it’s nice to be able to talk on here without being judged.

[thoughtful]

Thank you again for your kind replies. I know what I have to do but it is scary. Luckily for me he is working away from home for the next couple of days so at least I get a bit of peace, apart from the countless phone calls asking me what I am doing and where am I. I know you are all right and that a good father wouldn’t do the things he doesn’t. I am definitely going to leave as I cannot live like this any more. I need to pluck up the courage to do so but I will keep posting on here. Thank you again I don’t feel so alone now.

[thoughtful]

I just wanted to add that him is a great father, he doesn’t so much as raise his voice in there company it is only when theye are out.

[thoughtful]

Thank you for your kind replies, they have made me realise I am not completely alone although it sometimes feels that way. Ayanna you asked what was different this time to the last. The difference is Himpossible ( I shall call him that) got into trouble last year (detail removed by moderator)and was arresTed. Somebody in his family decided to call social serices. They had no problems and the case was closed. ( I must stress that he has never hit me in front of kids ) After all this is had a breakdown which thankfully I have recovered from. But he knows if I report him ss will get involved again and might say I cannot cope as he will tell them I cannot. Luckily the kids are away on holiday (detail removed by moderator) for 2 weeks. And what a terrible 2 weeks they have been, he has punched me repeatedly on head legs anywere where marks ddon’t show. He is convinced the minute he goes out I am having men in. He calls me a prostitute and a whole. He even does it in the street in front of total strangers. I could have died with embarrassment and humiliation. As soon as bedtime comes he is back to Mr nice expecting it every night and if I say no he nags and nags till I give in, as at least I know I will get a bit of peace afterwards. I am starting to despise him and I think he knows that. In the past he has broken my nose stamped on my head punched me, but it is the constant insults and abuse.I know it cannot go on but I am scared of making that final step in case it goes against me. Thanks for listening

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