wishingwell

[wishingwell]

Hi everyone. Thank you so much for the messages. I do think I’m holding onto the hope things will be ok in the end or that this is what I have to live with. Every relationship has its faults right. I cant talk to anyone I’m scared someone would take my child away. I cantconfide in a close friend or family it’s just too close to home to tell someone I know. The forum is my safe place to offload. I feel there is so much riding on our relationship that I cant leave.

[wishingwell]

What’s stopping me:
I love him – it’s not all bad we have many good times together and great memories. when it’s good it’s really good.
Daughter – I don’t want her growing up with parents separated. I’ve seen what it’s done to my husband and I would hate for her to go through it.
told you so – my family always knew he wasnt good enough for me and have made the point many times. As a result our relationship isn’t great. They dont know about the DV but the thought of me leaving and them saying I told you so is just shameful and embarrassing and I just feel stupid.
lonely – I dont feel I have anyone to go to. I cant go to my family as per above. We have the same circle of friends and I dont want them knowing the real truth
financially – we both have good jobs a home we are doing up. Financially we are strong together and I just dont know how I will support myself my daughter if we divorced
will he be ok – if I left it would absolutely break him. I think I would probably just about cope. But I fear for his mental well being. I dont think he will be ok and maybe its “safer” i stay for his sanity.
marriage is forever – as silly as it is from a young age I’ve always had in my head if you marry someone its forever there is no going back. you have committed to them no matter when things are going wrong you have to stay and work through it.

[wishingwell]

Thank you Wants to help. I do appreciate what you are saying completely. I did call a helpline when I was at uni during a low point and they said he will never change but I thought he would/could and unfortunately (detail removed by moderator) on he is still the same. I should have known better. Thank you I will keep looking at this forum.

[wishingwell]

Hi everyone. Thank you so much for your replies tthey were hard to read but you are only being honest and telling me what I dont want to hear but need to. My daughter is ok my husband would never do anything to her he never takes it out on her just me. I am doing ok thanks just a bad day wanting lockdown to end so we can return to our separate offices and I dont have to be in the house so much with him so that he can have a go at me over something and it turn nasty. Thank you everyone.

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