Forum Replies Created

Viewing 3 reply threads
  • Author
    Posts
    • #137684
      Brokensoul
      Participant

      Awww I’m soo glad you took the first step! Your sooo strong sweetie, You might not feel it, I know I don’t but honestly just knowing there’s some support makes a difference, my mental health journey hasn’t exactly started yet but there’s been alot of talk about it so fingers crossed we will both get the self confidence boost we deserve soon, your 100% not alone! ❤️

    • #137269
      Brokensoul
      Participant

      Hey lovely, I did actually contact my GP because I was feeling very low and explained that it was due to the fact I was in a controlling relationship and he sent me the link to refer myself for councilling firstly, unfortunately when they tried to contact me for an assessment my son was in hospital so I missed the call however another thing the GP had to do was inform child services as I have kids and I know how scary that sounds because as soon as the words were used I felt this lump in my throat but they have been a HUGE support, I can’t say anything has changed with regards to our relationship yet however they are very aware of everything that has gone on and have put plans in place to try and improve things, for example they are requesting we both have mental health support which I know personally will benefit me massively because I think what I struggle with is being strong enough to get myself out of this situation, they are seeing my children at their school regularly so of there are any worries or concerns they have they can be open about it and my social worker has built a lovely relationship with my older 2 so they feel comfortable with her enough to share their feelings, as for what will happen to my partner, they can’t physically do anything at this stage accept offer him help, if the abuse is more physical then there is a chance the police could step in, I had an incident a few weeks ago where he threw my phone against a wall and for that I did have police turn up at my door asking if I wanted to press charges, after all the questions they asked they came to the conclusion alot of what he was doing he could have been charged for and even locked up however I told them I didn’t want to and it was left like that, I think the GP will be more focused on you and building your self esteem/self confidence up giving you back your voice and in my opinion if we all had a little bit more strength and self worth these men wouldn’t stand a chance! I know personally I’m not even half the women I used to be, good luck with whatever you decide sweetie! Remember everyone wants to help you and you are the most important person in all this x

    • #136820
      Brokensoul
      Participant

      Thankyou for your reply’s ladies, I’m really trying to get myself back into a sleeping pattern and the kids being back at school is helping,I just feel like I’m going crazy, I’m cancelling plans with family just incase he uses it as an excuse to take this computer stuff one step further, I feel myself trying to keep him happy in hopes that he doesn’t betray me not knowing whether he has already betrayed me and then keeping my mouth shut about how I feel because I’m worried it’ll push him away but then if he was to leave would it be such a bad thing.. we’ve broken up before and he’s left and gone to his mums and for a day I’m ok and then all of a sudden it’s like a wave comes over me and I just crumble, it’s like I’m not strong enough to be without him even tho he doesn’t do anything anyway and I’m pretty much a single parent and when he isn’t here nothing really changes with the routine other than the fact he’s not sleeping all day so the kids can make noise and run around the flat like kids should be able to and me feeling on edge about them waking him up so all in all it’s better for us but I just don’t seem to be able to do it and it’s me after all that who is the one saying “come back” even after he’s telling me nothing is gonna change, I’m not gonna have my independence, and the routine will be the same, I’m still gonna feel like a one woman band, like I’m being pulled in every direction, and paranoid about his computer and we’re back to square one..

    • #131368
      Brokensoul
      Participant

      Hey hun, i just wanted to share with you my personal experience because its been very recently i have confided in the school and in all honesty they have been a god send! Im still in my relationship so it’s quite hard for me to be able to have conversations on the phone etc so having the school involved has been a. Massive help because ive been able to go into the school and speak to the family support person at the school and hes been none the wiser and shes been able. To speak with other professionals on my behalf, might be worth seeing if your sons school has someone similar because its their job to support families through stuff like this and they shouldn’t judge you, also the woman im speaking to has actually had a conversation with my daughter and asked about home life and her feelings and my daughter has been very honest and open with her and told her things she. Might not necessarily want to tell me herself so it’s given me an insight into how my kids feel about my relationship and how switched on they are with everything that goes on.. As for worrying about breaking down, i have had 2 meetings face to face with the school so far and both times i broke down in tears but it was such a relief to be able to pour my heart out to someone and have some sort of clarity that it’s not all in my head, i really lt hope things get better for you soon! Stay strong xx

Viewing 3 reply threads

© 2015 Women's Aid Federation of England – Women’s Aid is a company limited by guarantee registered in England No: 3171880.

Women’s Aid is a registered charity in England No. 1054154

Terms & conditionsPrivacy & cookie policySite mapProtect yourself onlineMedia │ JobsAccessibility Guide

EXIT SITE

Log in with your credentials

or    

Forgot your details?

Create Account

Skip to content