Dolphintale

[Dolphintale]

I have ADHD was diagnosed at (detail removed by Moderator) but mother refused to let them Medicare me. As I’m now a mum of two I am struggling with frustration and patience and tiredness. I was mentally abused for years among other things but now we’re in a refuge and safe but I’m on sertraline 100mg a day. Waiting for an adult assessment for ADHD so I can seek support again

[Dolphintale]

Hi I’m new here too I have ADHD and struggling with the site mechanics I can’t figure out how to post. I lived with my ex for (detail removed by Moderator) years and he was lovely to begin with then I got pregnant after being told (detail removed by Moderator) years earlier that it was almost impossible for me to get pregnant. Cue the accusations of lies and telling me to get rid me bawling my eyes out everyday and finally refusing to do that and gave birth to a daughter. Cue financial manipulation and feeling trapped. I was desperate to get back to work to earn my own money. Cue post natal depression. I started working cue the you work less than me the housework is your job tactic. Can’t cope with tantrums of child cue it’s all your fault we weren’t ready and withdrawing from providing support with childcare whilst I am around so it’s always my responsibility to do anything she needs. Cue the main type of depression. I get pregnant again cue the same tactic as before cue me trying to kick him out. Of course the landlord sees that we are equal joint tennants and refuses to help me. I say no to intimacy and he tries again I am conscious of our daughter next door asleep and our son in his next to me type cot literally right next to us. He refused to stop when I don’t physically respond to his advances. So I turn over and give in and allow him to get what he wants so the children don’t hear anything unsavory happening. (detail removed by Moderator) later I am bitter and he is increasing his rudeness and verbal abuse. Our child tells hi. You’re being rude to mummy say sorry. He says no he’s not and that ends that. Our daughter goes towards the kitchen whilst I’m feeding our son and he hasn’t closed the baby gate she ends up touching (detail removed by Moderator). He bawls at her why are you in here what did you just touch clearly more bothered that she is apparently being naughty than that she might have hurt herself. (detail removed by Moderator) I walk in and our daughter is cowering away from him clutching her hand and looking very distressed at her daddy. I ask if he checked her hand for any hurt he said I’ve o it just turned it on she should be fine. I look and she has white blisters on (detail removed by Moderator) fingers of that hand I provide the first aid and he becomes affectionate oh I’m sorry you hurt your hand. Putting the blame on her. I tell him e should have closed the baby gate he rages that how could he know she was going to go in there and try to touch the (detail removed by Moderator). She shouldn’t be going in there. Then he makes the excuse that he’s taking (detail removed by Moderator) which he shouldn’t be as a recent fall visit to a and e prompted a dr to tell him to take normal over the counter medication I.e paracetamol. We argue so much and he denies his responsibility so much I say we are going to the drs to get her hand checked. I put children in the pram and leave he says wait I’ll get ready and come with you I said no I don’t want you to come with me. I go straight to the police station and make a complaint and show her hand and we never go back alone. I tell them we need things to get us by for a while and he threatened he would have to sell everything BF to get his portion of the cost of it all back as he paid half of every item the children have. Or he wants me to give him his money back that he spent on it all. Then he says cos you’re the one leaving does that mean I don’t pay maintenance?!! I gave him the choice either you leave the family home so the children stay In their home or I go with the children. He said why don’t you just go and I said no the police advised I take the children with me. Or you go he refused and deliberately made his children homeless. I will never forgive him for that. We now live in a refuge. 😭😭. I just want someone to understand and tell me that I did the right thing I feel so guilty for leaving and not having the strength to make him go so the children could stay in their home I’m so lost and confused right now I’m on anti depressants now and I’ve had some counseling but it doesn’t make the negative voice his constant belittling has created in my head shut up 😭😭

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