Merlin22

[Merlin22]

As time passed found easy to spend money on things £30/40 t shirt I would walk around shoe boots clothes that had passed there best comments on my hair so would , one memorable occasion found really funny to (detail removed by Moderator) my family were not amused he said was joke .
He said I was a burden to be put on mortgage and that if I put me down as earning a wage through his company I was more viable (used my tax code )
Sucker I am said ok and never saw a penny all went into pay bills on house still asked for more so I put (detail removed by Moderator) a week into our account
Then unfortunately I found out (detail removed by Moderator) and have never felt the same about sex he made me feel like I wasn’t preforming if I said no he would huff and puff and sulk.
This is now roughly (detail removed by Moderator) this year he said if he didn’t get anymore attention then he would have to look else where ( went to bed and cried my self to sleep )
My husband had me feel …
Had a feeling he had cheated asked him and no was the answer ,
I left with our two children (detail removed by Moderator) since then I haw found out he had cheated on me and am now dealing with (detail removed by Moderator) relationship collapse
On leaving he knew I was going and I has come to told he said I have abused him and kids
What do say than this is bit of story and I appreciate all help and support x

[Merlin22]

Writing this make me so cross so angry as to why I was so slow to react so … stupid upset cross that I feel I put myself and allowed my self to be in this position for so long there is more to this

[Merlin22]

I think it all started with monetary abuse when son was born (10+ago) as I had to contribute which at that time meant nearly all my maternity pay went on contributing and I thought was total norm (fool) I was left cut off not able to afford fuel for car etc and few years later when daughter was born same again was little prepared that time had saved a little
I felt low after daughter was born as he used to remark to people about photos in our hall this is women I married and about clothing body shape size what I ate who I saw etc

[Merlin22]

Yes but earliest can be seen is September I know not far away but it’s so long away to talk

[Merlin22]

Not sure where it starts to be truthful and family and friends have pointed out so many time but I feel so stupid
And questioned myself and doubted that what I felt saw was true

[Merlin22]

Iam not sure at as it feels like I am tear myself apart from the inside out feel like a crazy person
Either cross or crying x so sorry not really took on board your comments may I ask your situ .
Please don’t think Iam horrid I am glad of support x

[Merlin22]

Thank you eggshells shall look see of can find these books

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