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Hi ladies, thank you so much for your replies, it made me feel already better to know that someone is able to understand what I have been through and it helps to see things with more clarity. I am quite keen on seeking professional support and I will do it. Thanks again for the books recommended.

-Kip, to aswer your question, no he does not abuse anyone else because he knows he cannnot do it. He is a smart guy and very manipulative. We do not have children or close family so I am his 24/7 target!

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I think I am going through the same ”processing” process. I have been in an abusive relationship for (detail removed by moderator) years and it is funny because just today lots of memories from the past came to my mind, and one of these was when I was strangled by him. I am now starting to remember the first bruises on my arms, the tears, the screams and I feel awful for not having taken any actions earlier. I feel I lost many opportunities in my life in order to be there for him, but I now I feel something inside me is changing. I only need to find my way out! Be strong and do not give up xxx

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