AceGracie5

[AceGracie5]

Hi InNeed

I know this is so hard and feels relentless at the moment, but please continue to be brave and courageous.

Just start speaking. Get it all out and said and you will feel so much better because you won’t be carrying it around inside you all on your own. Starting to speak out and say things that you have never told anyone is very hard to do but once you’ve done it once, repeating it or speaking out again, is never quite so difficult again. I find it lessens the power the perpetrator has over me, it stops you feeling so isolated and alone with what happened and you can do more than tell the truth. If people know the truth from you, they can begin to understand.

I don’t think the Police will think you are stupid and you are allowed to cry.

Sending you hugs and strength. You will get through this xxx

[AceGracie5]

Good luck, blueskies. You sound very brave and I admire you for wanting to try despite knowing all the pitfalls. However, as others have said already, mediation doesn’t work well with abusive people because they don’t have the control.
My ex thought it was a great idea while he did the talking and would agree to things in the sessions but then not comply outside of them and when called to account dropped out of the process pretty quickly.
Don’t let him dent you or sap the strength that you have built up over what sounds like quite a long period of time. The second he starts to play ‘silly beggars’, stop the session or withdraw. It is very difficult to reason with unreasonable people (we all already know this!)
Take care x

[AceGracie5]

My other fave:-

Roar – Katy Perry

I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath
Scared to rock the boat and make a mess
So I sit quietly, agree politely
I guess that I forgot I had a choice
I let you push me past the breaking point
I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything

 

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[AceGracie5]

Titanium – David Guetta and Sia

“You shout it out,
But I can’t hear a word you say
I’m talking loud, not saying much
I’m criticized but all your bullets ricochet
You shoot me down, but I get up

I’m bulletproof, nothing to lose
Fire away, fire away
Ricochet, you take your aim
Fire away, fire away
You shoot me down but I won’t fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down but I won’t fall
I am titanium”

[AceGracie5]

Dear Serenity, thank you very much for sharing your experiences and what you learnt from others.

[AceGracie5]

Hi BetterDays. I don’t know what to do for the best, but I don’t want him to define our futures.
This last year I have tried to move on with WA Freedom Prog and Recovery Toolkit courses and gone to counselling, but the fact that it is now profoundly affecting my daughter means I have to see that the fact that I minimised his behaviour and tried to cover it up by being a good mum to my children was and is not enough.
I just found a counsellor that my daughter is happy to talk to yesterday (hooray!), but is just counselling ourselves to come to terms with it going to be enough, or should he be made to see the damage he has done?

[AceGracie5]

Thank you for your honesty, betterdays. Big hugs to you xxx

[AceGracie5]

Thanks betterdays. So how do you manage it? Do you still have contact? How have you come to terms with it?

[AceGracie5]

Have you ever tried to make your ex see the damage he has done and the impact he has had?

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