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    • #14731
      Bella
      Participant

      Please, please please do not go back, call the police on 101 and log the messages or phone calls. He is intimidating a witness and the police and cps will utilize this. Please stay strong, you deserve to be treated much better than this.
      This man needs to be stopped. If he wants help he is more than capable of getting it on his own. But I feel he probably wont, because it is to do with his core belief systems. He believes the way he treated you is okay, and it is not. Please stay strong.

      All my love and support xxx

    • #14725
      Bella
      Participant

      I can totally relate to how you all feel, it takes time, and an understanding of what makes these men tick. Im six months clear now, however, my abuser is now out of prison, and has now consulted a solicitor, so I am about to start the legal fight of my life. However there is this part of me that wishes he was sorry and that he had sought help, but I know he won’t. What really helped explain things was a book by…Lundy Bancroft titled ‘Why does he doo that?’. It makes no excuses for any controlling or abusive behaviour. I definatly recommend reading it when you feel lost. It really helped me.
      Good luck things do get easier with time I promise. Xxx

    • #9702
      Bella
      Participant

      Well done, for all the positive steps, keep it up, but above all keep yourself safe.
      Take time out you are experiencing a very stressful time and it sounds like he is utilising everything at his disposal to keep you under control. Please keep yourself safe the problem with controlling individuals is when they actually realise they are losing control they can become unpredictable. Please do not be afraid to call the police. Many many big hugs. Keep strong.

    • #6490
      Bella
      Participant

      Many thanks, Karmasister. Your so right. I’ve blocked her number, (gone cold turkey), spoken to a very nice police officer and work are a great support.
      Sometimes when things look bleak, you don’t always need to look far for help.
      Many many thanks to all you lovely strong ladies out there, posting your stories made me realise I’m not alone.
      lets see what happens in the new year, and the court case ‘Eeeek’.

      All my love xx

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