Dragonfly

[Dragonfly]

My brother works away a lot so couldn’t stay there. I don’t think he’s going to stay at home after this. I’ll see what the police say. I’m sure social services will have to be involved. That’s never happened before either.

[Dragonfly]

I agree. If the police don’t pick him up they’re coming here at 8am tomorrow to arrest him. I don’t even know if he’ll come home. This has never happened before.

[Dragonfly]

I’m feel embarrassed and ashamed. This is worse than a partner attacking me. I’ve really no one to talk to, my family live miles away. I did speak to my brother and he is supportive but I think my son’s going to be taken away now. I don’t feel safe

[Dragonfly]

I know and thank you kip. I’m sitting here crying my eyes out. (Detail regarding age removed by moderator). He stole my band card the other day and withdrew money, I’ve cancelled the card. Hes wrecked my home a bit. My poor cat’s just come out of hiding! I can’t believe what he’s done. I’m going over it doubting it actually happened.

[Dragonfly]

Thank you! She was arrested and charged. Then suspended from work. Somehow she managed to manipulate me (detail removed by Moderator)

She didn’t assault me at work but she left physical marks on my face.

we don’t have a union but we have staff representatives. I have been documenting things and I have been letting my manager know how I feel what’s been happening etc. I think my manager doesn’t know what to do. I think I’ll speak to one of the staff reps.

[Dragonfly]

Thanks lisa

[Dragonfly]

It’s purely because I refused to give him £20 to go to some buffet with his friend. Stealing money is never acceptable. Anyway, he calmed down and we went for a drive. He’s sorry (obv) but says he finds it difficult to control his feelings, he’s a teenager, and thus is what’s happened. I told him by shouting and swearing at me then punching a door is extremely violent. I don’t like it. We’ve talked about next time he feels like this he’s to say time out then he’ll go away and calm down.

[Dragonfly]

He’s now sitting down swearing at me telling me I’m wrong. I can’t do this.

[Dragonfly]

It is a difficult question but maybe now, going forward I think we can recognise signs and hopefully stop it in its tracks by getting out before we get in! Personally I cannot see me having another relationship ever. Too many red flags everywhere which is quite sad to some extent. I’ve had a lot of ‘self’ taken away from me as I’m sure we all have.

[Dragonfly]

Do you think your situation would have been different if someone had approached you?

[Dragonfly]

I’ve seen it but it was with a work colleague and his wife. He speaks to her like she’s a child and also being very rude. This is over the phone so I’ve never met her but she seems to take it. I’ve jokingly said to him “ooooOOOOOOoooo feeling the love here” but he just mumbles and gets on with his work.

One of my friends desperately tried to warn me, told me what my ex did to his ex wife. Did I listen? No. In fact I told him what she said then within the month we were no longer friends! Been best friends for 30 yrs and he managed to get me away from her. We’re back to being best friends now though 🙂

[Dragonfly]

Thanks for clarifying Kip. This makes me feel so much better 🙂

[Dragonfly]

Hey Anonon. I would recommend speaking to WA. I called the first time and got through. I felt stupid calling for some reason then I lost my confidence and didn’t make much sense. The woman on the phone told me I could just drop in for a chat if I wanted to. So it took me a few days then I just went along, I spoke to a lovely lady who reassured me and more importantly validated me and answered a lot of questions. I was in there for ages. I’m so glad I went along.

They understand and will settle you. Don’t be afraid to speak to them x

[Dragonfly]

Iv’e often wondered about this. Can you clarify. He went on trial after I dialled 999 for him assaulting me. He was found not guilty because of his word/my word nonsense. So because he’s ‘innocent’ I wondered if there is any record of him having assaulted me or even that there was an investigation and trial. I’m trying to ask if this is still on his record even tho got away with it??

And well done for reporting xx

[Dragonfly]

I stopped caring after he physically attacked me for hours. It was an instant feeling of indifference. To think previously he had me under this mad world of control that I was actually helpless. He very nearly convinced me this was normal.

But!!! Ever since that horrific night I can honestly feel nothing for him. I get wound up when he was found not guilty at his trial, it winds me up when he decides to parade around in my area of town. But I don’t feel one ounce of love or sympathy or bind to him in any way. He has no empathy and I realised I was in love with a lie, definitely not a normal functioning person. I’d hate to be him.

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