CutieSunshine

[CutieSunshine]

Thank you for all your replies and I hope they help many others of you. I hope that I also am able to help others on my path of recovery. Serenity I really hope I do see him for the worm he really is ((( hug ))) thank you

[CutieSunshine]

I do feel like I want answers but I know that will never happen. He said I am only person he has ever treated badly because he doesn’t like me , his nice to everyone else but not me he said every week to me for years . I just put up with it , I use to shut myself off around him but I would still do anything he asked and then have a good cry when he wasn’t around because he would hurt me if he see me crying. Nothing is helping me at the moment. I still feel like his The only man who can make me feel better but I know it would only be a few hours fix that’s it!! He has seriously messed me up mentally. I’ve been to the doctors weekly but she just tells me it will get better xxx

[CutieSunshine]

confused123 that’s exactly how I feel , all this week I’ve cried because I am thinking of how he felt when we was Intimate. It felt like we was meant to be. My heart would beat faster and I’d get shivers like I felt safe in his arms. I don’t understand how you can love someone so much and them not love you ….

[CutieSunshine]

Thank you KIP

[CutieSunshine]

Thank you so much for your replies . I feel I am not alone now just knowing that others have also felt like this. I really feel for you all because no one deserves to be made to feel That way (((big hugs))) if you can get through it then I have faith that i will too . (removed by moderator) months isn’t long I suppose I am just wanting a quick fix to make me feel normal again . I had over 10 years with this monster.

[CutieSunshine]

Exactly I can totally relate to you , I got a new job and everyone was so proud of me but I was not . I just can’t feel happy about anything . I feel like I am the bad person he made out I was and I deserve to be alone . When really all I wanted was to feel and be loved . When I look back tho I don’t seem to care what his done to me.

[CutieSunshine]

Thank you for the replies. I woke up being sick again this morning. The stress and anxiety is so bad. He said his going to take me to court and destroy me but I don’t see how any judge will let him see his child after what his done to me. I don’t trust him to take care of him and he smokes cannabis 24/7 which I blame for making him more violent. I guess I have to prove this in court. It’s just a waiting game. It is so hard keeping strong

[CutieSunshine]

Thank you Lisa , you are right and that’s what I fox using on. I am spending the day with my parents today . My mother brought me a mug that said “mum your a star” for my son to give me , I am with people that love and care for me and it’s made me realise that I am not alone xxx

[CutieSunshine]

Awww thank you that is so sweet xxx
I spent a decades with this man too . I have hope that I will start to feel better xx

[CutieSunshine]

Oh dear, it’s upsets me to think of the damage these men have done us. I dreamt about him again last night . I am starting the antidepressants today so I hoping they relax my mind a bit and I don’t dream so much xx

[CutieSunshine]

the similar thing happened to me godchild , even when he was being nice to me i would dream that i was in lots of distress as he had gone from my life and this was because he would always make be beg to be in his life like i was unworthy of him because he was too good for me.

[CutieSunshine]

it seems to be all i can think about even when i am at work.. i just start day dreaming then realise i am at work and the time has just gone but that’s what i needed to hear that it does get better thank you confused123

[CutieSunshine]

thank you for the replies, you are right. I need to get as much support as I can .. I will end up going mad otherwise

[CutieSunshine]

I have been given Fluoxetine because I cant stop crying , I am worried it will make me worse. what have you been prescribed eve1

[CutieSunshine]

I have just rang up and asked to see a female GP, hopefully she will be a bit more supportive. I have sat and thought about it and I think the best thing I can do is come off the internet, not have email , I changed my number 3 weeks ago now so that is already done. I think that’s what I need to go and do Ayanna, go to the park and just scream lol

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