Hopefulwishes

[Hopefulwishes]

Hi

I’d like to know this too. I have however reported to the police and they wanted to arrest but I did a statement to say not to as I’m planning to leave. However they did say to me that they help with removals and do put another hat on and become removal people. You can ring 101 and enquire. They will make sure you are safe. This is an absolute last resort for me to do but I actually don’t know what to do anymore so I’m considering it.
I too have had a really bad few days. I hope your ok and you can get out safely. It’s sounds like your getting out situation is very similar to mine. We have to do it. We have to get away.

[Hopefulwishes]

That’s what I’m thinking do I stay off because I’m probably going to have meetings etc to do with it all and also mentally do I need to heal. I know I’m better being busy though. Guess I’ll take the week off and see how I feel.

[Hopefulwishes]

Thank you. I’m speaking to my support worker tomorrow she is really worried and is concerned that I see this as a set back. It’s just that I’m really scared. He has given me no choice other than to involve the police which i really didn’t want to happen. But he won’t let me go and the threats he made last night terrified me so much that I had a panic attack and was sick. I’ve never felt so ill in my life.

[Hopefulwishes]

Thank you so much. I’m going to ring my gp him and his mum now are trying to say I’m depressed and it stems back from me having a traumatic birth (detail removed by Moderator). No I was absolutely fine afterwards I’m depressed and worn down because of him and the mental torture I’m having to endure.
I have got a log with the police but I didn’t want to press charges before I need to speak to them again after this incident. He’s said to me not to tell him mum what he did (detail removed by Moderator) because she has (detail removed by Moderator) and has messaged her (detail removed by Moderator) to say that I’ve admitted everything was my fault and I’m embarrassed! I haven’t said that. I think it’s more that she will go mad with him and actually see what he’s truly like.
I haven’t spoke to a solicitor I’m not sure what to do legally. If I up and leave and don’t let him know where our little girl is etc.

[Hopefulwishes]

I don’t know how to get out of this I’m in such a state. It’s making me so ill. He’s scared me so much about the suicide and about taking me to court. So much more was said (detail removed by Moderator). He will not allow me to take my daughter anywhere. I’m worried if I just leave he will find me or cause me so much pain and trouble. I just can’t see a way out. I feel like this has really knocked me back. I don’t want to involve the police but I feel like I don’t have much choice. Why won’t he let me go! It would be ok if it was on his terms.

[Hopefulwishes]

Thank you KIP I knew I could rely on you for some good advice. I’m having such a battle with myself. Do I just leave whilst he is still asleep in the morning. I feel sick with worry.

[Hopefulwishes]

Yea it would probably make things worse. The last time I tried to sleep in my older daughters bed as she was away at her dads and he sent me (detail removed by moderator) messages tried to ring me (detail removed by moderator) to get me to go into him. I did because our daughter was in with me asleep.

I went to bed last night and he didn’t bother me. Now he’s expecting us to have (detail removed by moderator) and wants to be intimate. Is he for real. He’s acting like nothing has even happened. Then wonders why I’m off. He keeps saying to me are you in a mood. My support worker is ringing me tomorrow so hopefully she can just help me collect my thoughts and feelings. I would really like to leave this weekend whilst me older 2 children are at their dads.

[Hopefulwishes]

Thank you so much for your message. Things have been bad these (detail removed by moderator) but all of a sudden he wants us to get (detail removed by moderator) and do sexual acts as if nothing has even happened. I can’t bring myself to speak to him let alone have sexual contact with him but then he will use that against me. Everything is my fault. He can’t understand why I don’t want to.

[Hopefulwishes]

Thank you. I have a DA support worker. I’ll ring her tomorrow. I got out of the bath and he hasn’t spoken to me. He’s gone up to bed without saying anything which is very unusual and out of character. I’m just worried that when I go to bed now he won’t let me sleep he’s done that before.

[Hopefulwishes]

Thank you for your message. I have a DA worker and I also rang social services to make them aware of what’s going on and that I’m trying to leave. I get so frustrated with myself because I just don’t seem to be able to leave. I’m terrified of the aftermath. It doesn’t sit well with me just going and not saying anything to him because he doesn’t think he’s actually doing anything wrong! I know I don’t owe him anything. I couldn’t wait to go back to work this week but then when it comes to home time I start to feel anxious and I don’t like feeling like that.

[Hopefulwishes]

I’ve applied for universal credit but just for myself as I don’t currently pay for any childcare. If it comes to it and I change that is the process relatively fast for making changes to payments?

[Hopefulwishes]

Hi yes I have DA worker and I’ve spoke to the police. I didn’t want to get them involved if I can leave safely. She helped me to plan how I can leave but I still don’t seem to be able to do it! I just feel so guilty and deceitful just leaving and him not knowing anything until he either wakes up or comes home.

[Hopefulwishes]

Thank you for your advice. I was thinking of saying I’m having a clear out. To be honest my older children it would be their TVs so that would be as I left or at a later date if I could get back in and it’s all of our clothes. I’ve already got paperwork out or most of it. I’m struggling on how to say I’m leaving as he’s here all the time. I can’t deal with it after I’ve gone. It puts me in a tough situation really because he will kick off at me. I’d rather get out then arrange with his mum to come back when he isn’t here. I honestly can’t believe I’m in this position as I’m sure everyone else on here does. I’m finding it really hard.

[Hopefulwishes]

Hi

It’s a tricky one with their parents isn’t it. They will nearly always have their sons back because they are their child but I think with his mum she knows what he is like to a certain extent and she fled an abusive relationship with his father so I would like to think she would understand and be supportive. She doesn’t know where the new house is and this is something I don’t know if to tell her. I don’t want him knowing where I am. I still want to maintain a good relationship with her for my daughter. Hope you are ok too I’m struggling more than normal recently. I am going to try and sneak some bits out of the house on a morning when I go to work.

[Hopefulwishes]

Thank you. I feel more positive today. I would honestly be happy on my own for a long time now I think just rebuilding myself and focusing on my children and their happiness.

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