Freetobethegreatest

[Freetobethegreatest]

Free 🙂

[Freetobethegreatest]

Heya reading your thread was quite upsetting for me. I am in the process of planning how to leave my abusive partner. Were u planning on leaving before the incident? Had u written on here before? Reading your thread upset me as it reminded me of my partner. He has never hurt the kids but he does have a temper especially with me. Luckily i am a stay at home mum so he doesnt really have much to do when it comes to the kids but i would worry if he was a stay at home dad. I cannot (well actually i can) believe your partner pulled her hair simply because she got a chocolate? You have obviously done the right thing and i think u will realise this in time. Of course you miss him, your home, your routine. This is normal but eventually you will realise its the best thing youve done. Please dont go back. You have done so well finding the strength!!

[Freetobethegreatest]

Thank you so much

I have rang womens aid so many times. They have basically told me there isnt anything else they can do for me and told me i need to speak to my local unit and speak to an outreach worker. I felt a bit upset about this. I ring the helpline to talk but am not ready to leave. I am so concerned about someone knowing who i actually am and i guess it makes it so real. My main concern i guess is is it confidential as i am concerned about social services… I guess rather than anonymous i should have said confidential but ive had a day from hell. Cant think straight because of him

[Freetobethegreatest]

Things sadly stopping me leaving :

– Finance

– children together

– Shame

– fear

– Change is hard

[Freetobethegreatest]

Hey I dont think womens aid would tell the health visitor. Im pretty certain its confidential. Its probably just a routine check up and a coincidence. I understand how worrying it is living like this however. I constantly worry im gonna lose my kids because of him when i havent done anything wrong. Its horrible isnt it.

[Freetobethegreatest]

Im sorry I have no advice as sadly im still stuck with my abusive partner. How did u get him to leave? My partner will not leave. I only have two options to find my own place or go to a refuge. Both of these are nearly impossible i would pay him to leave but he wouldnt even go then

[Freetobethegreatest]

I feel the same ssss. Ive read some of ur posts and seems we are in the same situation. I dont know whether the abuse u are experienceing is mental or physical. But i am too stuck in this abusive relationship. I have been for years. Ive made So many attempts to leave but never have. I want to for my kids. But at the same time how can I turn their whole worlds upside down? New home new nursery new school no dad???? And why should i? He should go!!! I am desperate for him to just leave i would even pay him. I feel guilty weak stupid gullible door mat everything but then i know im strong because otherwise i would have killed myself by now. I lost my mum when i was (detail removed by Moderator) and now im with this monster i guess i was an easy victim but sometimes it feels like god really hates me

[Freetobethegreatest]

Went to the police when he attacked
Me but did they just let him come back home?? Yes. It was the biggest mistake of my life because i opened up to the police and they just treated me like some stupid little girl. He brain washed them of course and he got away with everything. He was back that night and it caused more trouble than anything. Would i ever go bk to the police again? No way. I should have known they wouldnt do anything

[Freetobethegreatest]

There is NO excuse to beat someone or sexually abuse someone!! Please dont think this way 🙁

[Freetobethegreatest]

Sat here with boxes against the door so he cant get in but of course he pushes his way in. Saying he’s the only person ive got that can help me what the hell!??? He’s the person causing all this. And of course saying the pill is to Blame for this its funny cos when im on period thats why im not on period now its cause im on the pill. Anything but him hey??? Unbelieveable

[Freetobethegreatest]

Sadly im still stuck with him though. Today i feel extremely down after another arguement. I feel so tired, so upset doesnt help its my time of month – of course he will Blame the rows on this. Constantly asking myself why me?? Why does god hate me so much 🙁

[Freetobethegreatest]

Yes i agree with u.

When i went to the police they completely threw it back in my face. They didnt do anything he just got away with it only thing they did was get the social on my back. Great. That was all i needed. And because of all this im still stuck with this evil evil man i thought i was gonna be free but no and now i just feel so trapped depressed and lonely

[Freetobethegreatest]

Thanks for the replies i didnt think id be Alone.

For some reason im so upset by what he’s done
I know im an idiot for even caring!!!

The fact is he said he was so sorry for everything he’s done, how he was going to change etc obviously id heard this a million times and knew he would never but him (removed by moderator) over porn is pretty much a kick in the teeth. Its just the prove i needed that he had no intention of changing he wasnt sorry at all. If you are sorry you dont do something like that. It shows what sort of person he is

Ohh and of course its my fault isnt it!!!

Because i wasnt having sex with him
…..i wonder why!!

Oh and of course its the “stress” its funny because everything he does is down to stress. An excuse for everything.

[Freetobethegreatest]

Thank you so much for all the lovely replies

This site is really the only place where i get support. Whenever i feel down i come on here. I have no friends and have not told my Family anything. I know i should but havent. The hardest part in all of this is keeping a brave face for the kids. I would hate the thought of this affecting them. They are my world and i hate him for what he’s done. You all mention how u love ur partners still. I dont. I would never have sex with him luckily we dont sleep in the same bed that would make me feel sick. When i look at him i just see this nasty, selfish disgusting excuse for a man. He blames depression, stress etc for everything obviously i believed this to begin with but its been a long time since i realised the truth. He’s just an abuser. I wouldnt miss him. My life would be easier in alot ways. Obviously the kids would miss him. I couldnt love him after what he’s done. I have so much anger for him which i know is not healthy. I know i have to get out but its not easy with two kids, all our stuff, finding a new place which will take someone who is not working? I dont want to go to a refuge because my son would not be able to go to his school still and i am not letting him be the reason my son loses his friends and has to move from a school he loves

[Freetobethegreatest]

I wish i had left when my first was only young. It gets so much harder when they get older. My sons love their daddy. In their eyes he cant do anything wrong. Obviously this makes it harder for me to leave because it will break their hearts. It took me a long time to realise what i was experienceing was abuse. When we met and lived at his mums there was signs (control, jealousy, anger) when we got our own place it got worse (walking on egg shells, cant do anything right, not wanting me to see my Family) but when i got pregnant it washing the worse and has slowly got worse. I was an idiot and had a second baby with him. Obviously i dont regret it as i love my sons but i shouldnt have had kids with a man like him. I hate the thought of having him stuck in my life forever

[Author]

Posts