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    • #91279
      Wibbles
      Participant

      I’ve just started a group and we’ve only done one week so far. But I feel reassured that I don’t need to speak unless I want to and if I do participate, I won’t be judged. After just one session I felt vindicated in what I’ve been feeling and realised I’m not exaggerating his behaviour and what’s he’s done isn’t acceptable. Please stick it out and I’m sure you will come to the same realisation. I know it’s not easy and it’s an emotional, difficult journey but you will
      benefit by the end of the course. If nothing else you will meet women who understand and who would support you 100%. Xxxx

    • #91278
      Wibbles
      Participant

      Well done you!

    • #91271
      Wibbles
      Participant

      You may be able to do private browsing on your phone that won’t show up in your history. If your partner is like mine he will get worse if you put a lock on it so don’t do it if it is likely to put you in danger. Could you get a cheap phone off eBay that he doesn’t know about just to post in here and make calls to support agencies?
      So sorry you are going through this. Xx

    • #90606
      Wibbles
      Participant

      Mine would say I shouldn’t be so sensitive, it was just a joke. Other times we’d make plans to meet somewhere or at a certain time and he would ‘appear’ to struggle to find me then say I wasn’t where we agreed or it was the wrong time. For years I thought I’d made a mistake, my eyes are open now!

    • #90445
      Wibbles
      Participant

      Well done you! It will may you time to get properly back to you but you’ll get there. You are doing so well. Stay strong. Xx

    • #90388
      Wibbles
      Participant

      Definitely try Rights of Women, they give advice on how to do certain things on your own so you don’t need to pay a solicitor. I’ve just started this process so can’t advise further but I will be doing as much alone as I can. Good luck and sending hugs. X

    • #90387
      Wibbles
      Participant

      He sounds like my ex. I’m living with my parents as I couldn’t stay and I’ve applied for an occupation order but no idea if I’ll get it. I feel so guilty for even trying and wonder if I’ve exaggerated the abuse over the years. Stay strong and stick to your guns, don’t make it easy for him, he has brought this on himself. Xx

    • #90386
      Wibbles
      Participant

      Call the helpline and see if they can give you details of any local organisations who can offer you support. Go back to you GP, tell them you’re struggling on the Mexicans see if you can be referred for counselling or some other therapy. You don’t need to feel alone, there are people who can help. Sending hugs. X

    • #90384
      Wibbles
      Participant

      Hi, well done in getting to where you are. I went to make a police statement today and I’ve also posted forms to try to get an occupation order and non-molestation order, I’m terrified I won’t be beloved and that this will all just make things 10 times worse. Since I told him what I was going to do he ramped up the nasty comments to the children and sent me horrible texts blaming me for everything they are suffering. He even had me doubting myself and wondering if I’d exaggerated everything.
      I keep being told he’s panicking now and things will get worse before they get better but it really is terrifying!

    • #90059
      Wibbles
      Participant

      This is abuse, plain and simple. Me ex would always say our problems were my fault and I had to to no about my behaviour. I tried everything I could to placate him and tried to be the perfect wife. Nothing was good enough and I realise now, nothing would have been.
      Calling you names and putting you down is not acceptable, you are worthy or love and you don’t deserve this. Please seek support from Women’s Aid or the Police.
      Thinking of you. Xx

    • #90057
      Wibbles
      Participant

      I’ve left my husband but whilst he is still in the family home alone, my kids and I are living with my parents. People keep telling me I need to kick him out but I still feel guilty as he has nowhere else to go. From what I understand, guilt is a typical emotion and that’s linked to the way we’ve been treated in the past. It’s so hard to say, “No! I and my children deserve better!”
      I wish you all the strength and love as this is the hardest thing you’ll have to face.
      Keep posting. Xx

    • #89713
      Wibbles
      Participant

      I’d like to hear others experiences too. Me and my children are currently living with my parents but this is not sustainable long term. I’d like to ask him to sell the family home and split the money, can I do this? I’m. Awaiting a solicitor appointment. X

    • #89712
      Wibbles
      Participant

      Thanks for sharing, that really give me hope for the future. Xx

    • #88974
      Wibbles
      Participant

      Well done for starting to talk about it. I was scared too at first but I’ve told the Police and Women’s Aid, a solicitor and my kids school – everyone has believed me and been so supportive. It has given me the strength to stick to my guns and stay away from him.
      You will be believed, if you encounter a sceptic, move on and speak to someone else. There are plenty of people and organisations out there who will support you through this.
      Thinking of you. X

    • #88969
      Wibbles
      Participant

      You sound very brave and much stronger than you probably feel. Can I ask how you got him to leave, I had had to move out to family as he refuses to leave the family home. The children keep asking when we are moving back in and I can’t bear to tell them I can’t. I’ve only been gone (detail removed by moderator) and so far he has barely spoken to me or messaged me. Only contact has been regards the children. I want to start moving on but feel like I’m In limbo.

       

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