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    • #143474
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Tea and biscuits
      Please do not doubt yourself.
      You have said he has made you unhappy for years…don’t forget that!
      I am in exactly the same situation as you. I told my husband of a long time that I wanted to leave recently. He cried and then said we will sort it out! He keeps telling me he loves me and making future plans! It’s so so hard isn’t it.
      Keep on making your future plans
      Take care x

    • #143419
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Hi loulou 1313
      Welcome to the forum. There is so much support on here. I have found everyone to be so honest and helpful.
      Take care x

    • #143297
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Dear Nbumblebee
      I can tell from what you have written that you are very angry. I don’t know if this is the right advice but I am so glad you are angry at him. I am also glad that you are not blaming yourself. For everything that he has done and is doing to you, it is no wonder you are angry. You now need to channel your anger into something positive. Unfortunately I am at the same stage as you are and I gave not found out how to do this yet.
      You deserve to be happy and feel loved…never forget that.
      Take care honey x

    • #143246
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Thank you so much for the links x

    • #142383
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Eggshells
      Your advice is so spot on..thank you x

    • #142298
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Dear chocolatebunny, searching for hope and BananaBoat
      I too am in the same position as you all. So so desperate to leave. So unsettled. Hating every second spent with him. Hating watching how it affects our kids. Sometimes I feel so desperate. I am not trying to overtake your post….just wanted to let you know you are not alone and I understand.
      Take care xxx

    • #142047
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Dear Dreaming offreedom
      Absolutely everything you have written is exactly what I am feeling.
      From what you have said in your post, you are becoming stronger all the time. Please keep on telling yourself that his behaviour is not normal!
      Take care honey x

    • #142003
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Gettingtired….I really feel for you and I completely understand where you’re coming from. Please keep on posting on here. It is so so difficult to comprehend how behaviours escalate.. I feel for you. Yes it is so stressful x

    • #141858
      Gerbil
      Participant

      I have just been reading through this post which I posted roughly a month ago. Well the tension really had mounted. Every second he is at home, he is getting at me for something. I can’t begin to describe what it is like. As I am lying in bed now and can’t sleep, I have just realised that my heart is racing. I would not describe it as a panic attack, just extreme anxiety I presume. I just feel so anxious waiting for the next put me down or complaint. I do worry about the affect this stress is putting on my body.
      Take care everyone x

    • #141573
      Gerbil
      Participant

      I am so sorry for your loss. Please take care. X

    • #141443
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Dear strongenough
      I agree some days are just so hard! Venting is good! Sharing on here is good! I hope you are having a better day today.
      Take care x

    • #141441
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Thank you all for your replies. I think I have lost sight of what is normal. When he tells me over and over again that I am a useless parent for not “punishing” our child, I do start to question myself. I need to keep on reminding myself that he is in the wrong and not me. I watched today that short clip on the freedom programme about what is a good partner. Does anyone know of anything else like this to help remind me what is normal?
      Take care everyone x

    • #141086
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Nbumblebee….I completely understand where you’re coming from. Just remember how strong you are ! Can you go somewhere in your car and just pull over and scream and cry. I also hit the steering wheel ( but I wouldn’t advise that!). You could make it a regular thing…some people find it releases some of their tensions!
      Take care honey and keep posting x

    • #141005
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Hi Grumblebear
      Welcome to the forum. Keep posting on here.
      Take care honey x

    • #141440
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Hi
      I am sure you haven’t upset or offended anyone on here. You are always so supportive of everyone on this group with your insightful comments. You are definitely not weak honey. I find your posts show your inner strength.
      Take care honey
      x

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